One of the great things about having colonies – or ex-colonies, if they’re still dependent on you – is that you can shovel your rubbish into them. Examples of ‘rubbish’ are nuclear waste (the Pacific, I think), criminals (Cayenne, Virginia, Australia), political dissidents (Siberia), and now unwanted immigrants (Rwanda).

I wish I’d thought of that while I was writing my books on the British empire. This perverse new refugee policy of Priti Patel’s is obviously a legacy of European imperialism that I’d missed. Colonies are our dustbins.