I’ve watched the first two live ‘debates’ between Trump and Clinton, and am determined to watch the third, at 2 a.m. (our time). Friends tell me they can’t – it’s all too depressing. Kajsa, in Stockholm, says she won’t watch it alone. (We saw the last one together. It helped, being able to cling on to each other.)
Why is it that I’m so attracted by this sort of thing? I watch films of Hitler’s speeches, too, transfixed, like a rabbit caught in the headlights. It’s only political horror that thrills me this way; I don’t watch disaster movies, for example, or horror films, or any kind of fighting, or pornography. Trump, in fact, seems to be my own particular form of pornography. I watch him with deep loathing, but I have to admit that his loathsomeness is part of the attraction. I also feel dirty afterwards. What does that make me? Is it a male thing? Or am I a pervert of some kind?